Empathy for Sale

I've written about the power of storytelling in fundraising many times over. I've also written about the ethical question of organizations sharing their client's stories (see Who's Story is it Anyway?).  Well, here we go again...

Last weekend, walking along Pacific Avenue in Santa Cruz, I spotted a gentleman behind a card table set up on the side walk. He appeared to be in him mid-50s, neatly groomed long gray hair, comfortably dressed, ready to be of service. The sign on the front of his table read, "Free Empathy."

Certainly empathy is something that frequently seems to be in short supply in these stressful times, but, I would argue, so are opportunities to show empathy. People are hungry, not just to find somebody to listen to their troubles without judgement, but to reach out and comfort somebody else as well.

By now you've likely heard the story of Karen Klein, the school bus monitor from upstate New York, who was videotaped by a group of young boys who were bullying her to tears. One empathetic person who came across the video on YouTube decided to send Klein on "the vacation of a lifetime" and created an online campaign to raise $5,000 for that purpose. That amount was raised in a few hours. By the time the campaign ended, 32,000 people had given over $700,000.

Each donor could see the total already raised, and knew that the target amount had been reached hundreds of times over. And yet they still gave. The campaign was bigger than simply reaching out to Karen Klein with a virtual hug. The donors wanted to make a statement. They wanted to be part of a movement.

Yes, there are official nonprofit organizations who work on bullying issues that they could have donated to - some of you probably think that would have been a better investment, and you might be right - but the campaign for Klein's benefit offered something more tangible. A story. A story and the chance for direct philanthropic empathy.

Many people I've met over a couple of decades in the nonprofit sector believe that they are highly empathetic, and I believe that's often true. Thinking about which nonprofit staff I've known to be highly motivated and effective workers, versus those who simply go through the motions as burned out bureaucrats, the difference is often empathy. The best workers are those who connect to their client's stories, who feel their pain, and share their joys. Indeed, this is why we are in this sector. The stories are why we do what we do.

So, let me ask you this... Why do some of us expect our donors to be any more connected to our organizations and motivated to support our causes without knowing our client's stories? Why do some of us believe we can raise the funds necessary to do our jobs while hiding every detail of the lives of those we serve?

Yes, protect people's privacy, get permission to use testimonials, etc., etc. You know the drill. But most donors want something beyond a tax deduction. They want a connection. They want a human face. They want a chance to empathize. Just like you do.

Speaking of storytelling... Video is a great way for your organization to share your stories, and the DoGooder Video Awards each year recognize great achievement in nonprofit video storytelling. If your organization has a video you're proud of, you have until March 22 to enter for this year's awards. Head to the DoGooder webpage to learn more.

Whose Story is it Anyway?

I am one who has always believed in the value of good story telling in fundraising. Nothing earth shattering in that statement. Most anybody who has been successful in nonprofit fundraising - whether writing grant proposals, doing direct mail, or creating event programs - will tell you the same thing.

Even with foundations (and others) seemingly more focused than ever on outcomes and measurements, when I teach proposal writing I always caution my students from getting so caught up in the numbers that they forget the human element. Data and statistics, I tell them, may help make the case, but it's putting a face and a story to that data that gets signatures on checks.

With that in mind, I also believe that nonprofits who want to be effective at fundraising should always be on the look-out for good stories from the people they serve, encouraging them to (if possible) write out their experience of how the organization helped in their own words. These can be used in proposals, letters, speeches, etc.

For years this was considered good advice, and was appreciated by my students and clients alike. Until earlier this year.

The program staff of an organization I was working with all very strongly felt that using these real stories - even with names and identifying details changed - was a violation of their client's trust and privacy, ethically questionable, and akin to an act of violence.

The clients had been through rough times and did not have much. What they did have was their personal story, and to take that from them was beyond exploitation. Unless the client voluntarily and without prompting offered, "I want you to use my story to market the organization," there would be no compromise on this position.

I completely understood where the program staff was coming from on this, and the importance of being respectful of telling somebody else's story. But I also know the reality of trying to raise funds for even the best of causes without the ability to talk about the organization's success in terms of the success of the individuals it serves.

I have no simple answers with this blog post, other than to inform and ask permission before using a client story in your organizational material. But what do you think?

Are the stories of your client's success so important that it justifies exploiting them to raise money? And while the circumstances that brought a client to your nonprofit may be their private affair, don't you have some right to talk about how you helped them out of those circumstances? Please comment below - I'd love to know how you handle this delicate issue.

The Importance of a Good Success Story

From Guest Blogger Christina Delzingaro. Christina has over 20 years of success as an entrepreneurial non-profit executive. A graduate of Randolph-Macon Woman’s College and of Averett University, Christina has her undergraduate degree in developmental economics and a Masters of Business Administration. After many years as Executive Director for a regional non-profit, Christina created Sage Strategies, a management consulting firm (www.SageStrategies.org). The firm specializes in strategic planning, board development, financial management, program planning and evaluation and grants management. As Principal, Christina takes the lead in Sage Strategies’ projects for small to mid-sized non-profits.

An old non-profit. Slogging along. Doing good work for children. But doing it the same way for the past 30 years. Operating from a perspective of poverty, tragedy and crisis. The loss of major funding brought them to a real place of poverty and crisis. The Board had a decision to make -- close the doors, or do things differently. They chose change.

The first step was to hire an Executive Director with the ability to make the programming changes necessary to address the needs of children and families -- the changes funders and long-frustrated community partners had been asking for. The goals were to improve outcomes for children, increase funding and increase community awareness. They asked me to help.

In order to become relevant, the organization had to change its context: its reason for being, its image, its story. They needed to move from being problem-focused to solution-focused. Mostly, they needed to stop being such a downer -- the pity party had to end. Everyone wants to be part of success 0 we're drawn to what is positive. We had to create a success story. Here's a quick look at six months of strategic, happy, thinking:

The old mission statement:
"We recruit, train and support volunteer host home families to shelter abused, neglected and at-risk children and youth."

The old mission statement describes what the organization does day today - recruiting and training volunteers to act as host families. But to what purpose?

The new vision/mission statement:
"We envision a Commonwealth in which all children and youth have the opportunity to experience the lifelong benefits of a safe, nurturing family. Children and youth deserve families in which they:

• are safe from harm,
• feel valued and worthy of love,
• are free to heal and grow,
• can learn to love and to trust others, and
• have the opportunity to build lasting relationships with adults.

Our mission is to improve the lives of at-risk children and youth, by providing a network of volunteer host families."

Wordy, and still a work in progress, but it shifts the focus from the tools used to do the work to the organization's core purpose. From process to outcome. And from problem to solution.

The old outcome measures:

• # families recruited
• # families certified and active
• # speaking engagements
• # newspaper articles
• # brochures distributed
• % placements made within 24 hours

Under the old mission, the organization's measures of success were focused on the size of its volunteer corps, not on how services created change for children. And so staff spent time in a flurry of activities (and a lot of counting). They also collected stories of children served as a way to measure impact. The stories told of abused children being taken in the middle of the night to stay for a few days with loving host home families. But few of the stories had endings. Because of the way programming was provided, the organization only had access to the children during the 1 to 21 days of their stay with the host family.

The new outcome measures:

Volunteer Families' Vision for Children & Youth	Indicators
... are safe from harm	- No reports of abuse or neglect - Parenting Stress Index
... feel valued and worthy of love	- Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale
... are free to heal and grow	- Casey Life Skills - Service Plan Goals
... can learn to love and trust to others	- Multidimensional Scale of Perceived Social Support
... and have the opportunity to build lasting relationships with adults	- Family Reunification

The new mission and changes to the program design provided a basis for more meaningful measures of program impact. One of the most significant changes in the programming was to provide more respite services, in order to reach children and families before abuse or neglect occurred. The second change was to extend the program to include on-going case management and family reunification services.

Now staff spend time assessing the strengths and needs of children and families, linking them to host families who are best situated to provide the specific supports needed, and measuring the changes services are making over time. With this information, we will be able to create a story arc that leads to family reunification and stability. A happy ending.

The old name: Volunteer Emergency Families for Children
The new name: Volunteer Families

Working with a great branding firm, Birch Studio, we quickly saw that the easiest way to remove the sense of crisis from the organization was to remove the word "Emergency" from the name.

The old logo:
The new logo:

The creative team at Birch Studio chose to spotlight the relationship between a child and caretaker. This focus on individual relationships side-steps the issue of visually defining a family while tying into the tagline, "Give your heart to a child." The sketchy quality of the logo has an informal and approachable feel. The open circle shape is a complete arrangement that feels inclusive but not stifling.  The adult's arms partially encircle the child's, signifying protection and security. The adult shares their heart with a child; the heart is open showing the possibility of new relationships.

The old Case Statement:
"Each year, thousands of children are abused, neglected or at-risk of abuse or neglect. We provide the safe haven children need to protect them from further damage inflicted by living in an existing or potentially hostile environment. Once a child is placed in the safety and security of a host family home, they may begin their journey toward a future free from brutality."
 
The new story:
"When crisis strikes, many of us rely on relatives, church or friends for support. But for some parents, there isn't a safety net. And for others, the safety net is extremely fragile, with parents often depending upon elderly grandparents or distant relatives to care for their children.

"Volunteer Families is here to help. Our statewide network of volunteer host homes expands the community safety net. Volunteer Families gives parents the time they need to address the issues that created the family instability, and provides a safe and nurturing temporary home for their children.

"For biological and adoptive families, we are a safe alternative to child welfare custody, significantly reducing the number of children entering the child welfare system. Volunteer Families can provide an overwhelmed and resource limited parent with a safe, temporary home for their children, without threat of losing custody. For foster parents, respite services can reduce family stress and increase the stability of placement for foster children."

The new story is one of success. It includes the elements that Douglas Gould & Company and The Topos Partnership identified in a recent study as being critical to telling stories in ways that "generate interest, excitement and a sense that progress is possible."

Volunteer Families is only three months into its new identity. There is still a lot of work to do. We don't know what the final result of the changes will be. But the sense of excitement and progress is felt throughout the organization. New partners have come to the table. New services are being provided. A funding partner recently cited Volunteer Families as a model for strategic change. The grant that was lost was restored -- at three times the previous level. The story is not over.